Setting Boundaries Without Guilt
Let’s be honest: Setting boundaries can feel hard. As Christians, we’re often taught to be selfless, forgiving, and endlessly available. But sometimes, what we call “love” or “patience” is really just people-pleasing dressed up in a godly outfit. And when we keep sacrificing our peace, our emotional safety, or our walk with God just to keep peace with others - we end up empty.
There is a very thin line between helping your brothers and sisters in Christ and people-pleasing.
I’ve stayed in conversations too long (sometimes being the one carrying it). Kept giving grace when what I needed was space. I’ve allowed disrespect because I didn’t want to seem “difficult”. And I’ve tolerated things that didn’t align with the woman God is shaping me to be — just to avoid conflict.
But hear me clearly:
Godly boundaries are not rebellion. They are obedience.
They’re how we protect the calling, peace, and growth God has entrusted to us.
One of the hardest boundaries I had to set was in relationships. Especially with people I cared deeply about. Whether it was co-parenting challenges, an emotionally tense season of healing, or friendships that no longer fed my spirit, God began showing me:
“You can love them, and still say no.”
“You can forgive them, and still create distance.”
“You can serve Me, and still protect your peace.”
When I stopped allowing guilt and fear to drive my decisions, I made space for clarity, healing, and deeper intimacy with God.
Here’s how I work to set boundaries in my life:
* I try not to entertain conversations that drain me or disrespect my growth.
* I try to limit my access to people who cause confusion, not peace.
* I try to say “no” without explaining myself to protect my emotional and spiritual health.
* I try to bring everything to God in prayer before I react.
But notice how all of these start with “I try..”. Setting boundaries is harder than we realize. We get so caught up in wanting to comfort everyone, avoid conflict, and vent to “get it off our minds”. When really we’re just building habits that keep us in a fight—or—flight, anxious state of mind. It’s not healthy and it’s certainly not how God wants us to function.
God’s Word gives us so much wisdom on this:
— “Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” - Proverbs 4:23
— “Let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No’ be ‘No’ - Matthew 5:37
— “Do not be misled: ‘Bad company corrupts good character.’” - 1 Corinthians 15:33
These aren’t just suggestions. They’re strategies for protecting our peace.
🍃Encouragment for Today:
God isn’t calling you to carry what He’s asked others to lay down. He’s calling you to protect your temple, guard your spirit, and walk bolding in your identity — without guilt.
🙏🏽 Prayer:
Father,
Give me the strength to set healthy boundaries rooted in love and wisdom. Help me walk in grace without guilt, and choose peace over people-pleasing. Teach me to say no when needed and to trust You to handle the rest.
In Jesus’ name,
Amen.
📌Call to Action:
Journal time! Write down one boundary you know God is asking you set. Ask Him for the courage to follow through.
Then share in the comments or DM me on Instagram @riseandrenewblog — let’s grow through this together.
